For years, I’ve been asked if I’m going back to work after a baby has entered our family. I don’t shy away from it. My answer is blatantly, “Yes.”
Then the next question is usually how long of a leave I’m going to take, because from the asker’s perspective it’s never going to be the right amount of time because I AM going back to work. Two weeks, 6 weeks, 12 weeks of maternity leave-does it really matter? What’s right and deserving?
Going Back To Work After A Baby
In our family, I am the breadwinner. I trot off to work every day to bring home the meager earnings while my husband stays at home with our boys. We choose to have a limited income so that we are with our children as much as possible and we do not have to worry about the daycare provider while paying a horrendous amount for it.
Every family situation is different. You deal with your circumstances the best you can.
Am I taking a long enough maternity leave so that I can properly bond with my baby? Who’s to say that I wouldn’t bond with him otherwise?
I’m taking 12 weeks of maternity leave. Legally under the Family Medical Leave Act in the U.S. I’m allowed that, as are you, every working mother is. But does that mean we can afford it? Here’s one mother’s story.
Not all employers will compensate their female employees any pay during their maternity leave. I, fortunately, am blessed with a benefit of receiving 70% of my pay during my leave. But is it enough?
Can You Afford It?
The National Bureau of Labor Statistics recently published data showing that 1/4 of all mothers on maternity leave are returning to work after just two weeks-TWO WEEKS! Are these superwomen that we all want to be like? Are they just performing miracles at home so they can rush back to their desk job away from their little ones? Are their babies so independent that they can take care of themselves?
Of course not. It’s because they cannot afford to go any longer without the benefit of a full paycheck. Nothing more. These mothers work their tail ends off in order to make ends meet, whether alongside a working husband or alone. Whether at home or in the workplace, ALL of these mothers are noteworthy.
Most women do not receive any maternity leave pay and have to supplement with their own paid time off or simply go without. In cases like my own where the mother’s income is necessary for the family’s financial stability, this is hardly an option.
It comes down to the choice between physical well-being and financial health. Oddly enough, both affect the other in the long run too. So these mothers have to decide between the immediate consequence of one or the other.
Do I want to put bread on the table, or feel more physically rested after a few more weeks? We as mothers would automatically choose to put bread on the table because of the divine nature we carry to provide. It’s a hard balance to stay afloat on.
But you DESERVE the ability to take leave MUCH longer than two weeks.
Do You Need It?
Netflix recently made headlines announcing that they were providing unlimited maternity leave for their mothers up to a year after the birth of their children. How amazing is that?! No questions asked, if they need to stay home how long and whenever they want or need to, it’s given.
If I was a Netflix employee, I really don’t know if I would take that entire year. But I’d sure love to take a few days off every week at least after the first 4-6 months postpartum. That way if I had doctor’s appointment or whatever I wouldn’t need to make the hassle of come and going so much.
I DO know that a mother’s body certainly needs more than two weeks to recover. Sure, some women bounce right back and are ready and eager to get right back to work, no problem. Others, feeling the repercussions of a surgical procedure that was necessary or a difficult delivery can last even into years ahead. And who can know what you’ll need before you even give birth? No one.
But knowing that the coverage and option are there brings SO much more peace of mind.
Sure, I’m glad that I’m going to have 12 weeks of leave. I’m not excited about the budget being trimmed back 30%, since that’s virtually all of my savings and charitable giving amount right there. So I’m going to be dipping into my savings in order to get by, but that’s what it’s for.
I’m not going to take one day less than my 12 weeks because I know that every moment is precious with my children. I know that I’ll likely be recovered enough to feel well enough for work, pending everything turns out okay here in the next few days (fingers crossed).
Recover Much Better With This Perfect Bundle
So take ALL the time that you possibly can. YES, you need it, whether it feels like you will or not. You won’t regret taking more time than two weeks. I don’t know your circumstances, but I DO know that taking the time with your children is worth infinitely more than staying on the clock for the boss.
Two weeks or two years, do what you can. What have you done to make the most of your maternity leave?
Wow, for me two weeks is definitely too short. Thank goodness I had a lot of leave available. 12 weeks maternity with full pay and 3 months paid vacation.
That’s a fabulous maternity leave benefit you have there. Are you in the states? I’d be interested in knowing where you live and/or work. It just might become a more popular place for mothers.
So you took a full six months about with your baby? That’s incredible! Thanks Emma.
Great post and something I think every new mom worries about. I was lucky and unlucky! I work for myself so I took my baby to work with me, that was the lucky bit. I had him with me full time until he was a year old. The unlucky part is that it is not easy working full time with your baby!
I only took 2 weeks off. I worked until the day before my birth and was back at work 2 weeks after having my c-section.
It wasn’t easy and I struggled a lot but I wouldn’t have it any other way. I was able to continue running my business and have my little buy with me all the time. He started creche at the beginning of this year when he was 13 months old.
It’s hard in any circumstance and you’ve proven it with your story, Lynne. I find it super difficult to work on my site here unless my children are in bed for the night, or I have extra time at my day job away from home. That way I can get in a mode and know that I won’t be interrupted. I’m sure you made the best decisions for your family after your c-section and I’m glad that everything has worked out for you, Lynne. Best!
Really awesome info! My wife took a long maternity leave too. The bonding is important with the cild. I think kids are like an investment: you never want to make a bad investment, so you have to take care of it. We decided to take a financial hit, and one of us works only half a day to be there for our kids as much as possible. Why would anyone go back to work after 2 weeks? The husband could stay home, or just cut back spending?
It’s hard to understand why anyone would go back so soon after having a baby. It’s so individual to circumstances that we can’t fully know unless they’re our own. Bonding is important. But we can only make the best decisions for our families with what we’re given. Thanks for your comment, Michael!